Did I Ask For Fries?

Have you ever heard the piece of trivia that says that during an average human lifetime you eat 10 spiders and 70 other insects whilst sleeping?

Unfortunately I think the current state of our apartment is definitely contributing to my lifetime total.

Is anyone else in Sydney totally overrun by cockroaches right now, or is it just us? The apartment building we live in turned two last December, and as a birthday present we seem to have been granted an abundance of cockroaches. Goody.

I’ve never really noticed them here at all before, but ever since getting back from Ecuador I have seen the little critters crawling about under the kitchen sink with wild abandon at all times of day and night.

Now I have a little confession to make: I can be both a slob and a grot. While I know that having these babies running around isn’t exactly reason to celebrate, while I was just seeing little ones, I must admit I wasn’t too concerned. It’s not like they are huntsman spiders or anything completely nasty after all!!!

But now these “cute” little cockies have grown up and become big MFs that fly across my bedroom ceiling. We are now officially at war.

I’ve been feeling a bit crappy today, and so my Friday night consisted of lying on my bed reading one of my many inane chick books for about the tenth time^*. I was briefly convinced to wander up to King St for some Chinese food, but upon returning immediately curled back into bed with my book.

I was having a pleasant enough time of it, until some movement on the opposite wall caught my attention. Big MF cockroach was sitting there staring at me. So I lay there staring right back at him for 10 minutes, but I guess he won our little staring comp. Dante had to save me by coming in and nuking the sucker with repellent.

Score: us - 1 cockies – 0. woohoo!

Half an hour later I’m still enjoying my book. I’ve sprawled out over the bed by now, quite relaxed until one of the little suckers crawls over my arm. Can we all say EEEEEEEEEWWWWW!! If they have the hide to do that while I’m awake and moving just think what they have been doing other nights when I’m dead to the world!!!

I started flapping about trying to hit the sucker, but all I achieved was to scare him off, no doubt to return with reinforcements in a few hours time when I’m asleep and at my most vulnerable.

Score: us - 1 cockies – 1. It’s only downhill from here I fear.

Help!!!! I don’t think I can ever fall asleep again!!!!

^* Wow I think reading some of the reviews of this book were nearly funnier than the book itself. Wish I had discovered that earlier. All I have to say is get over it people, it’s supposed to be a relaxing read!!! If you want to read something a bit more meaningful then steer clear of books that have tubes of lipstick illustrated on the back cover for heaven’s sake!!!